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Important Lessons from “Tongue Tied: Untangling Communication in Sex, Kink, and Relationships”
2 min readOct 23, 2019
Earlier this year, I read Stella Harris’s Tongue Tied: Untangling Communication in Sex, Kink, and Relationships. I was excited to learn more about communication in relationships, something I’ve been trying to focus a lot of study in.
Three specific lessons stand out from the book, and I feel like they are worthy of sharing.
“It’s important that we give our partners a chance to meet our needs before getting upset that they haven’t magically done it.”
I think we are all guilty of becoming upset because somebody did not pick up on a subtle hint or clue we thought was fairly obvious. At the same time, it is not fair to get angry at somebody because they have not read our mind. It is only when we communicate honestly with each other about our needs that we can actually feel slighted — at least if you want to have a strong relationship.
